What I Wish Someone Told Me Before I Took That Promotion

(P.S. I love what I do. I love leading people. But let’s talk about what no one warns you about.)

Getting promoted to a leadership role feels like winning a golden ticket… until you realize the chocolate factory is on fire, and the team is looking at you to fix it while you're still unwrapping the damn wrapper.

I love what I do. Truly. Leading people is the most meaningful work of my career.
But there are things I wish someone told me before I stepped into it—things I would’ve appreciated knowing before I agreed to “just take a few 1:1s.”

Let’s talk about them.

🎧 1. You Will Miss the Simplicity of Just Writing Code

Leadership is meaningful—but it’s rarely clean.

There’s no PR to open, no green check to validate what you did.
Half your job is:

Resolving tension

Translating vague requests

Listening more than talking

Managing other people’s emotions while ignoring your own

Coding gave me dopamine. Leading gives me… ulcers (and impact).

🔎 2. You’re Now the Default Emotional Dumping Ground

You are now:

A therapist

A translator

A human whiteboard

A rubber duck with trauma-processing capabilities

It’s fulfilling. It’s also exhausting.
And nobody really teaches you how to do it without absorbing it all.

📉 3. You Will Get Less Praise and More Blame

You know you’re doing leadership right when the team is thriving and nobody mentions your name.

The problems?
Those will all find you—loudly.
Your wins?
They show up in other people’s work, not your highlight reel.

💥 4. You Have to Unlearn Being the Hero

Before: You jumped in and fixed it.
Now: You let someone else struggle a little longer so they can learn.
It sucks. It’s awkward. It feels wrong.

But that’s the gig.
Leading means giving people space to grow, even when you could’ve done it faster.

🛠 5. You Need a Whole New Set of Skills

What made you a great dev:

Attention to detail

Technical precision

Speed

What makes you a great leader:

Patience

Empathy

Ability to explain things 3 different ways without sounding condescending

It’s a whole new language. Start studying.

🧠 6. The Job Is Mostly Conversations, Not Commands

You thought leadership was about direction?
Surprise: It’s 90% alignment. Conversations. Context. Feedback loops. Soft nudges. Second chances. Coaching. Redirecting without derailing.

It’s people work. Not product work.

💬 TL;DR

I love what I do. I wouldn’t go back.
But if someone had pulled me aside before that first promo and said:

“Hey, this isn’t a linear upgrade. It’s a class change.”

…I would’ve walked into it with less ego and more tools.

So if you're next in line for a leadership role?

Take it—but take it knowing what it really means.

✊ mullins.io
Tech career honesty. No buzzwords. No fluff. Just the truth—with a sarcastic side of mentorship.